Weather: 74 degrees, 97% humidity- perfect weather for embracing the suck
Location: NBP (without the tower thanks to Paul Blart)
QIC: Goob
Pax: BigMac, Bing, Brutus, Clutch, ChiliPepper, Coop, Dasani, Defib, Deep Dish, Goob, Hot Pocket, Jimmy Dean, Manziel, McNuggett, Puck, Ripken, Sniper, and Trump
The disclaimer was stated and before the mozy even began, their was chatter about the impending burpees everyone was certain to come. Goob smiled and took the pax for a 1 lap mozy around the loop. The mozy included high knees, carioca right and left, and finished with a nur. After the COP, QIC reminded everyone that car shopping sucks. And in a poor analogy, he forewarned everyone how much the impending beatdown would suck just as bad as car shopping. From there, he led the brave across the street to the Palm Tree hill.
COP: 15 SSH in cadence, 20 Michael Phelps OYO, small to large arm circles both directions OYO, and some Cobra ab stretching.
The Thang:
Once across the street, Goob proceeded to provide the good news- this beatdown WOULD NOT entail burpees. The heavens opened momentarily and the pax joined the angels in singing hallelujah…. briefly. That all came to a crashing halt once QIC informed everyone that the replacement would be what some argue is the perfect, total body exercise- the Turkish whorehouse. Goob demonstrated the proper technique for performing the getup. The pax would soon discover that even without the kettlebells, this exercise does indeed suck. The good news? The first round only included 1 whorehouse! The bad news? This would be the first exercise in the 11’s performed by running to the top of the Palm Tree hill. Once up top, 10 Captain Thor’s awaited. The first groaning began during the 2nd repetition of the first set of Captain Thor’s. Before the first 10 CT’s were finished, many of the pax were spewing venom towards Goob and begging for the return of burpees.
No one finished the 11’s in their entirety before QIC called the audible and had the pax jog back across the street. Folks were encouraged to Usain Bolt the long way back to the parking lot before circling up for a final exercise, the Ring of Fire. All 18 had to count to five whilst slowing pushing up or down in the merkin. At 6am, chaffed backsides, sore abs, and general suckery out of the way, the beatdown ended. All rejoiced.
Announcements:
9/9 Ronald McDonald house
Sniper led fundraiser lunch at Detwiler’s off University TOMORROW from 10a-4p. Pork lunch plate with all proceeds going to load a truck to help the folks in Oklahoma.
Several races upcoming
Praises/Prayers:
Gator’s continued recovery and the hand of God being so completely on this entire situation.
Goob thanked his brothers for their prayers and the sense of brotherhood he’s found at F3.
Jimmy Dean’s daughters volleyball team- proper adult behavior post season
Trump’s mother and her health
All of the injured pax- Lancelot, Sparky, and others
First responders
Thanks for embracing the suck this morning. I love the comraderie, the suckery, and the chaffed backside. Humbled and honored to lead the 18 this morning. Coffeeteria at Panera was good fellowship as well.
Goob out.