Hair Nation: A Self-Deprecating Tribute


Weather: 60-degrees and sunny

QIC: Recall

PAX: Drake, Mr. Clean, Lambo, ShamWow, Rebar, Six Pack, Olympus, Smudge, Tiger, Papa Smurf

11 H.I.M. posted in the gloom, eager to find out what YHC had in store. Mr. Clean, Six Pack and Olympus all had their own (incorrect) theories on what in the world a Hair Nation Workout would consist of. It would consist of awesomeness…nothing more, nothing less. YHC polled the PAX on the 5 Core Principles and the beatdown commenced with a 2 lap mosey around the parking lot, incorporating High Knees, Butt Kickers, Karaoke, and Toy Soldiers. YHC led the PAX to the Echo Chamber where we circled up.

The Playlist

YHC always tries to incorporate music associated with the Beatdown’s subject matter.  On this Gloom, we enjoyed music from the great Hair Bands of the 80s.


  • 25 SSH – IC
  • 10 Florida Strawberry Pickers – IC
  • 10 Imperial Walkers – IC
  • Hamstring Stretches
  • 10 Peter Parkers – IC ~ Hold Plank
  • 10 Parker Peters – IC
  • Quad Stretches
  • 20 Freddie Mercury’s – IC
  • Forearm Stretches
  • 30 Moroccan Nightclubs – IC
  • Wrist Stretches

The Thang

News Flash!  Extra, Extra–read all about it!  YHC announced that he is a victim of  male pattern baldness.  Shocking news!  Anyway, YHC noted that he wanted to further discuss this subject.  

3 activities were planned for the morning.  The first activity was called The Follicular Challenge.  Four stations were set-up: H, A, I, R.  Each station consisted of exercises that included each station’s Letter.  YHC advised that PAX would AMRAP each listed exercise for 1-minute before moving-on to the next exercise.  There would be no breaks between exercises.  Once each station was complete, each PAX ran 2 laps around the Echo Chamber before moving clockwise to the next station.  Keep grinding until all stations are complete.

Following, YHC led the PAX to the basketball court and circled everyone up.  YHC stated that he had 3 choices to address his male pattern baldness: 1) just let it go and embrace what will eventually graduate to a Friar Tuck look, 2) shave it off like Mr. Clean and Drake, or 3) fix it.  YHC advised that he had selected option #3, and that he was undergoing hair transplant surgery this upcoming week.  Modifying as needed, if you will…   YHC advised that this was painfully expensive.  YHC was kind enough to share some of this pain with the PAX via cash withdrawals from the ATM.

Once enough cash was sacrificed to the gods of plastic surgery, YHC led the PAX to the field.  YHC advised that following surgery, and after considerable time, his hairline will be transformed.  YHC asked for the PAX’s assistance in transforming the hairline of his close friend, Mr. Norwood IV. 

PAX counted off into teams.  YHC advised that they, individually, would complete an exercise on the board.  Once complete, they would run 40 yards to a board featuring the head of Mr. Norwood IV.  At arrival, they will take their team’s pen and draw 1 hair onto Mr. Norwood IV’s head before running back to complete the next exercise.  Rinse and repeat until time.  The team with the most hair added to their Mr. Norwood IV wins.

Victory for Team Green!  Man, I hope my hair procedure doesn’t turn out like this…

The Moleskin

YHC noted that his receding hairline had personally bothered him for about 20 years, and that he just didn’t feel like shaving his head was “him”.   YHC advised that he was excited about his upcoming procedure, and thankful to have the resources to do it.  YHC stated that he was never pressured into his decision, nor ever bullied about his hair loss.  The decision was his, and his alone, noting that he’d contemplated and researched it for several years.

YHC stated that he and his M were recently discussing body perception, bullying, and how Social Media has raised (to a dangerously superficial level) the importance of one’s appearance.  YHC’s M stated that she couldn’t imagine being a teenage girl in today’s Social Media environment.  YHC’s M (who is a stone cold stunner, by the way), noted that she sometimes feels upset about wrinkle lines, occasional gray hairs, and other aspects of simply getting older.  YHC advised that there are a lot of young people (and adults) out there struggling with body issues.  These pressures are magnified immensely by Social Media.  It can lead to bullying, and it can also lead to lower self esteem.  If not addressed, it can transition to depression.    

YHC advised that the majority of the PAX out there had 2.0s and/or Ms.  YHC urged his peers to shower their 2.0s and Ms with praise, letting them know how special they are, and how much you love them.  As fathers and husbands, we (not Social Media) need to be the dominant force in boosting our family-members’ perceptions of themselves.  Make sure they know you feel that they’re beautiful, inside and out–on the regular.


  • Men’s Outreach Stocking Stuffer Party tonight at Recalls – RSVP please
  • Men’s Outreach Event coming up THIS TUESDAY – don’t miss it!
  • Several upcoming races and mini-Tris.  Sign-up today!
  • Be sure to keep up-to-date on items via the F3 Suncoast newsletter

Prayer Requests/Praise Reports

  • Prayers for the women in Papa Smurf and Drake’s families dealing with back issues
  • Prayers for the quick healing of an injured brother during the Ragnar event
  • Prayers for Recall’s upcoming outpatient procedure

Great job today, men!  Aye!