To the sounds of “Lick It Up” and “Detroit Rock City,” the Pax endured torture of various exercises. But first…
The 5 core principles were barked and the FNG was warned of the risk of bodily harm and the need to sue Bing, if such harm was encountered.
The mozy was unconventional and led us through the parking lot, around by the lake, behind the playground and back. Once back to relative safety, we did not do Side Straddle Hops to start, which caused a brain hemorrhage by a Banjo. Toy Soldiers led the way, followed by Imperial Walkers, Big Boy Situps, then SSH. Mr. Clean said that the balance of the universe had been restored at that point.
The Pax were instructed to grab their hydration and head to the pavilion. Here they learned 4 simple exercises meant to test their will. A four would be done in a set of 1o, followed by a set of 20, then 30 then 40 reps.
First it was Under Table Rows, then Swing Crunches, followed by Log Jumps in the parking lot and Side Thrusts in the Echo Chamber.
The second round was shorter due tot time, only doing sets of 10 and 20. Dips, more Swing Crunches, Salsa & CHiPs (squat followed by side tilt like turning a California Highway Patrol motorcycle like Ponch and John), and lastly Burpees.
It was determined that while KISS is a band for the ages, their best stuff happened 30 years ago. Their recent music sucks…but we survived. Wilson plans to have his KISS “butt-hat” tattoo removed given their recent music talents.
Praises for Mr. Clean’s daughter being pregnant. Prayers for the same and injured/sick Pax.
Ripken out.